after 9 months of getting used to the gradual changes in my wife's body, its crazy to think that any day now a small life, a part of us, will finally be experienced. it seems almost like its not really going to happen, that perrin won't actually come. when we met with our midwife a couple weeks ago, to her surprise, he was so much lower than she expected him to be that she was able to be pretty confident in saying that he would most likely come earlier than the due date. so we've been living our lives with an air of expectation. every small prelabor sign would cause us to get our hopes up, only to be disappointed later. we are now 2 days from the due date and there are yet more prelabor signs but it seems like he won't really come. and then for a brief moment in time it hits me how close i am to having that little life in my hands, how my entire life is going to change, how ready i am for that change.
i've been processing through this concept of stewardship, of how God never created man with the intention of allowing him ownership of anything in this world, but rather to steward what is His. my job, my wife, my possessions, my money, my son, none of them are mine, they're God's. and though i've been living my life as of late in an air of expectation for the birth of my first born son, i submit to the fact that he is not mine but God's. and with that understanding comes an ability to walk in a greater faith in my God and what He allows for me to experience. i trust Him to do what's best. perrin is God's. he will come when its time for him to come. as much as i remind myself of that, its still hard to be patient.
i've been processing through this concept of stewardship, of how God never created man with the intention of allowing him ownership of anything in this world, but rather to steward what is His. my job, my wife, my possessions, my money, my son, none of them are mine, they're God's. and though i've been living my life as of late in an air of expectation for the birth of my first born son, i submit to the fact that he is not mine but God's. and with that understanding comes an ability to walk in a greater faith in my God and what He allows for me to experience. i trust Him to do what's best. perrin is God's. he will come when its time for him to come. as much as i remind myself of that, its still hard to be patient.
Eric - Thank you for sharing a perspective far beyond the grasp of many first-time fathers. I can remember when our oldest daughter was delivered. There was profound wonder and awe for what God created, but not the full sense stewardship as you describe. Thank you again for helping me see more clearly!
ReplyDeleteGod Bless,
Mike Mendenhall
So here I sit waiting again to hear if the labor has progressed through the night. I decided to check your blog to see if there is anything new and well here I am, my eyes full of tears as I read of the profound revelation that God has given to my son-in-law. I am so grateful that God in his faithfulness chose you Eric Hershberger to be the husband of our daughter Jani and now to father the children God blesses the two of you with. Many times throughout my parenting years I have had to be reminded of these truths that you have recently come to understand. Even now as I anxiously await the birth of my first grandchild and the labor and delivery that I will witness my daughter going through to bring him into our world, I have to again embrace these truths and surrender all my concerns to the Lord, knowing that these precious lives belong to the Lord.
ReplyDeleteI so look forward to being a witness to the beautiful gift soon to be delivered into our world and to share in being a good steward of the precious life of Perrin.
I love you!
Patricia